And lo, the Church of England signed an accord with the Department for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport to permit church spires and bell towers to be used to house antennae, satellite dishes and fibre cables in order to improve broadband, mobile and WiFi connectivity for local communities. DCMS Secretary of State Matt Hancock said: “Churches are central features and valued assets for local communities up and down the country. This agreement with the Church of England will mean that even a 15th century building can help make Britain fit for the future improving people’s lives by boosting connectivity in some of our hardest-to-reach areas.”
We are told that Improved digital connectivity will bring a range of benefits to rural communities, including:
- better access to online public services
- improved social interaction with family and friends
- effective online presence meaning that local businesses can extend their reach and better compete with other
businesses, or in the case of tourism businesses, better attract visitors to the local area
- better access to skills and training which can lead to further local employment opportunities that deliver
improved productivity and can boost the wider local economy.
And lo, there was much adulation and praise from government ministers, internet service providers, telecom companies and a few bishops, not least because the rental income will undoubtedly help these Grade II listed historic buildings fix their leaky roofs and shield their medieval treasures from raining bat guano.
What we are not reminded of is that the internet is also the world’s sewer for all kinds filth, perversion, violence, deception and moral degradation.
True, of course, that the technology is morally neutral: like all advances in communication, it can be used for good or evil; and the light of Christ can reach into the darkest pits of depravity. But no church would host a printing press if its output were both bibles and blasphemy. No church would broadcast a radio station if the truths of one programme were contingent on propagating a thousand lies. No church would host a television or cinema if it were to screen both divine precepts and degrading pornography.
But we won’t be able to tell how people are using their broadband, will we? It’s their dirty little secret.
And we won’t be able to see these antennae and satellite dishes, will we? They’ll be concealed from every eye (if not bat antennae).
Hear no evil; see no evil.
And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins;
Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience:
Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others (Eph 2:1-3).
Lust, lies, greed and violence.
Straight sex, gay sex, child sex, tantric sex and animal sex.
The whole internet is driven and financed by the multi-billion-dollar ‘adult entertainment’ industry: wherever cyber-technology leads, you can be sure that porn peddlers have already envisaged a use. “On the internet, streaming video, credit-card verification sites, Web referral rings and video technology like Flash all can be traced back to innovations designed to share, and sell, adult content.”
It’s all right there before you, at the click of a mouse, courtesy of your parish church spire.
The Church of England is surrendering its steeples to the prince of the power of the air : its bell towers and church spires may point toward the heavens, but henceforth shall they be mired in perversion and filth; strangled by corruption and desecration.
Here’s the church.
Here’s the steeple.
Open the doors and see…
Well, these 15th-century buildings may be quite empty of people, but why bother actually going to church when you can follow the service in the secure isolation of your bedroom via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and LinkedIn, also all courtesy of your parish church spire?
God bless the Church of England for helping to bring the Archbishop Cranmer blog to 10,000 isolated rural communities. May they be rewarded a hundredfold (at least).