mrs proudie
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Low-Churchophobia Week to combat militant High-Churchers

Good heavens! Eyebrows were most definitely raised this week as The Jupiter reported on the murky doings of Westmonster. It seems no young person’s seat is safe from the wandering digits of lustful MPs and the unsolicited proddings and pokings from Black Rod. No doubt emboldened by their big majorities, these parliamentary predators lurk in corridors and lobbies, waiting for a well-turned ankle to come within range before they pounce. Now the cat has been let out of the bag, some have decided to quit while the going is good.

The Secretary of State for War (you can say ‘Defence’ if you like, but I prefer honesty to euphemism), Sir Michael Fallenonhissword, has admitted to being an unashamed kneetrembler, though one suspects he has darker secrets in his closet. We shall see. The Eagle sisters have lodged a formal complaint with Mr. Speaker that in all their years in The Commons, not once have they been approached by gabardine-clad under-secretaries for broom-cupboard Ugandan relations, arguing that under Miss Harman’s Equalities Act they are entitled to their fair share. At least their diversity will keep them warm.

Of course the Spanish know how to deal with troublesome politicians, as recent events in Catalonia have shown. Poor Señor Pugdogmonte should have known better than to flee to Brussels, where opinion is against him and nothing exciting has happened since the Duchess of Richmond’s Ball. Meanwhile, the streets of Barcelona throng with supporters of this side then that, all waving the same flags. The Archdeacon is of the opinion that Latinos are an excitable lot, infatuated with movement and colour. I put it down to jalapeños.

Since Mr. Carnage came from Canada to take over the Bank of England, we cautious folk here in Barchester have been keeping a close eye on matters financial, including stocks and shares. The news that it now costs the taxpayer £1 million a day to feed, clothe and house refugees spread like wildfire: folk got it into their heads that their bank accounts would be raided to pay this ever-spiralling bill (something they call a ‘haircut’ and which we call theft), and so long queues formed outside the Barchester and Middlemarch Providential Bank and Loan yesterday. I spotted Mr. Bunce amongst the anxious throng.

“What are you doing, Bunce?” I enquired.

“I put it in Mrs. Proudie, but now I’m pulling it out.”

“Explain yourself, my good man!”

“I’m taking out all my savings to hide under my mattress before the government takes it all,” he said.

“I’m sure there are no plans to do that,” I replied, trying to calm his agitation.

“Well I’m taking no chances! That colonial fellow is not getting his sweaty palms on my groats,” he mumbled.

As if he’d want to – at least not without gloves.

Inspired by Comrade Corbynov’s latest wheeze, the Archdeacon has instigated a Low-Churchophobia Week, to combat anti-Anglican opinion which, I fear, has been growing of late. Most of the abuse has come from an unholy alliance between militant High-Churchers and the Strict and Peculiar Baptists (Kamikaze Branch), who have taken to demonstrating wearing black outfits and masks to elude identification. Banners read: ‘We’re incensed!’ and ‘Hands off our Calvins!’. Very tribal. A group of these blackguards turned up at a musical evening in the Barset New Connexion Chapel on Wildebeest Street, where the talented folk singer Elvis Wesley was about to perform – an event jointly sponsored by the Cathedral and our Methodistical friends.

“It was mayhem, dear lady,” said the Archdeacon as we walked back after the Pleasant Sunday Afternoon gathering we attended. “Windows were smashed, chairs thrown and fists flying! As for the language, the air was blue! It was the sort of thing you’d expect from Mustafa Fatwah’s lot, not our fellow Christians. Ours is the religion of peace, or at least it should be.”

Goodness! Coming from the Archdeacon, hitherto a man very much in favour of ‘Christian Soldiers’ (unlike the St. Marxian cleric in Oadby), this seemed remarkably mild.

“Had it been Mr. Fatwah’s Band of Brothers, I fear things would have gone with a much bigger bang than that,” I replied.

“Too true,” replied the Archdeacon.

It struck me then how much time and effort we Christians waste on disputes within the faith, focusing on trivia and ignoring the bigger picture. We have been plagued by contentious issues – women priests and bishops, same-sex marriage, refugees, abortion and assisted-suicide – leaving a moral and spiritual vacuum currently being filled by another, more aggressive faith, one that I believe will change everything and consign us to Dante’s ‘Third Ring’. We no longer do enough to win hearts and minds, but self-identify with the virtue-signallers, the Cooper-Balls of this world. We need reformation, root and branch.

But then, of course, we’ve had one, thanks to Martin Luther and his ilk. I understand the Reichskanzler, Frau Merkin and her entourage of Turkish Delighters attended a commemorative service in the church at Wittenberg, where Luther’s movement began. Having done her utmost to destroy Christianity in Europe, she has the brass neck to goose-step along with the Evangelical establishment performing happy-clappy for the cameras and telling Germans, “We can do it!” Well she’s done it, and in less than a decade there won’t be any Germans.

Oh well, no point in moping. I have things to do, as I daresay you have too. So, as the snowy white whiskers of Jeremiah Corbynov beguile the nation’s youth into believing Santa will deliver, and the candle-snuffer of thought-crime smothers the flickering flame of freedom, I bid you adieu, until we meet again.

  • Dominic Stockford

    The German ‘Evangelical Establishment’ is not what I would call genuinely evangelical whatsoever. Ditto for their ‘Protestant’ denominations (in general).

  • Chefofsinners

    An imperious piece, inspiring and dazzling, Mrs Proudie. You are the underwiring that keeps the nation pert.

    Elvis Wesley is and inspiration. Songs that spring to mind are –
    One about St Peter and the Catholic Church: Failhouse Rock
    The anthem of the CoE liberals: A Little less Consecration a Little more Faction.
    And the Linus song: The Devil in Disquis.

    • dannybhoy

      Very good Chef.
      Failhouse Rock indeed..
      Here’s one from ‘Ole Swivelhips’ the for the Anglicans amongst us…

      Uh huhhh.

      • Chefofsinners

        If I have caused anyone any distress at any time, I would like to apologise and state that I am now seeking therapy. Also, I am now living as a gay man.

        • Brian

          You forgot to say you have no memories and are beyond horrified. And you will be on the Ellen De Generes Christma- sorry, Holiday Special. And you have a book coming out? Did I say ‘coming out’?

    • Brian

      The Elvis Wesley anthem of C of E liberals is ‘Wooden Head’.

      • Brian

        The Gafcon/Welby number is ‘ (We can’t go on together with) Suspicious Minds’.

        • Brian

          and an in-your-face one for Linus: ‘In the Gateau’.

          • Chefofsinners

            Surely ‘Are you loathsome tonight’?

          • Brian

            Ouch! Now I’m all shook up.

          • Chefofsinners

            Or maybe ‘Return to Bender’

          • Anton

            Can women be ordained? Sung by liberals:

            Well that’s alright, Mamma
            That’s alright with me…

          • Chefofsinners

            I’m Crying in the Chapel.

          • betteroffoutofit

            Well … once in a ‘blue moon . . .’ (ever a favorite of mine).

          • Chefofsinners

            Elvis Wesley and the Zionist Christians sing: Don’t you Step in my Few Saved Jews.

      • A Little Less Conversion, surely?

    • You missed the ode composed by Luther: A Fool Such As I.
      And Leo X’s reply to his letter: Return to Sender.

      • Chefofsinners

        A song for Pope Clement VII and his successors:

        Well… since my Henry left me
        I’ve found a new place to dwell
        Down at the end of loony street at
        Fruitcake hotel…

    • Mrs Proudie of Barchester

      My corset just burst open! Thankfully I was alone in my boudoir, reading your message when ‘A little less Consecration, a little more Faction’ passed before my eyes…oh how I laughed. Inspired, dear Chef, inspired!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • Chefofsinners

        Egads! Your corset? If the nation’s underwiring hath lost it’s corset, wherewith shall it be underwired?

  • Manfarang

    Ah I thought so. That Jupiter is like the rest of the British tabloid trash.
    That God I live in a place where the barbers know what a good haircut is.

  • IrishNeanderthal

    Mrs Proudie,

    Last weekend on Countryfile we were treated to the spectacle of columns people rambling though the countryside wearing yellow hats with ears which were supposed to represent a bear called Pudsey (a far cry from Paddington, may I say.) Did you see any of these columns invading Barsetshire?

    I feel that there is something sinister about those hats. I wonder if they were actually thought-control helmets?

    • Manfarang

      Somethings are unbearable.

      • Brian

        I wish they would bear Pudsey away, along with Terry Wogan and the whole smug aren’t-we-wonderful-and-funny? Children in Need bore ….

        • Mrs Proudie of Barchester

          Indeed. One would think, with all that money raised over the years, that Pudsey’s eye would have been fixed. Perhaps he is still on an NHS waiting list.

  • Inspector General

    Mrs Proudie, dear heart.

    You are showing concern for the pretty young things at Westminster where concern is not due. The so called victims who have been fingered are in the main of the royal maggot variety. Hoping to one day acquire a parliamentary seat. And they do. Laid by same queen of moral collapse whatever party they be. Such is the stuff our rotten statesmen are made.

    The place is full of fat grubs, damn them!

  • Having done her utmost to destroy Christianity in Europe

    The destroyer of Christianity answered questions from members of the public during a visit to Bern in 2015. One questioner asked: ‘Madam Chancellor, you talked just now about your responsibility for the refugees. Another responsibility is to protect us here in Europe. Most of the refugees from Syria, and the refugees from other countries, have a Muslim background. The gentleman referred earlier to a great fear in Europe about this Islamization, which is happening more and more. How are Europe and our culture to be protected from Islam?’

    The salient points of Merkel’s reply: ‘Islamism and Islamist terror are phenomena that, of course, occur predominantly in Syria, Libya and northern Iraq, but to which, unfortunately, the European Union has contributed large numbers of combatants. So we cannot say this phenomenon has nothing to do with us, because these are people…who have grown up in our countries and we have helped make them what they are.’

    ‘…of course, we also have this debate about there being many Muslims in Germany, we have the debate about whether Islam belongs in Germany. But when there are four million Muslims here, I think there is no longer a debate about whether Muslims belong in Germany…’

    ‘And if in Germany you asked [pupils] to write essays to explain the meaning of Pentecost, I assume that Christian knowledge in the West would leave a lot to be desired. And then to complain that Muslims know their Qur’an better, I find that comical.’

    In Merkel’s world, Europe shares the blame for Islamic fundamentalism and Islamic terrorism, Muslims and Islam are integral to Germany and, as Muslims are more devout than Christians, Christians are in no position to complain about Muslims. I imagine every mainstream politician in Western Europe would have answered similarly.

    • dannybhoy

      “‘…of course, we also have this debate about there being many Muslims in Germany, we have the debate about whether Islam belongs in Germany. But when there are four million Muslims here, I think there is no longer a debate about whether Muslims belong in Germany…’”
      They may live in Germany but do they belong in Germany?
      Considering all that Islam stands for I would say ‘No’.

      • Inspector General

        Germany will ‘awake’ as they say, Danny. It’s in their DNA not to be subject to any alien influence…

        • Manfarang

          The original

          • Inspector General

            One was thinking of the invasion of Germany by Rome in 9 AD that saw the 17th, 18th and 19th legions destroyed. The annihilation of that many men saw that Rome never again contemplated bringing the place into the empire. One believes they lost heart over it.

            If an Inspector remembers his schoolboy history correctly, it was a close run thing and there were apparently insufficient survivors to bury all the dead. Eventually, the valuable armour and supplies were made off with by the locals, but human remains, stripped of flesh by scavenging animals could be found all over for many years afterwards.

          • Manfarang

            Germania, get the name right.

          • Anton

            The Varusschlacht was a truly dark tale. At about the time that Jesus was presented in the Temple and lingered, to his parents consternation, the Romans were campaigning east of the Rhine to see if it was worth extending the borders of the Empire farther east, presumably to the Elbe. (At his barmitzvah Jesus would have been about 13, but the battle took place at the same time because Jesus was born several years before year zero, oddly – someone somewhere in history couldn’t count.) The leader of this Roman campaign was Varus, an ethnic Roman who had earlier been in charge of the Holy Land. His second-in-command was the son of the leader of an already-conquered Germanic tribe, the Cherusci. This son knew the lie of the land and was called Armin (Herman), or Arminius. He had been educated in Rome in hope of turning him, but he secretly nursed a hatred of Romanitas while learning Roman military tactics. During the campaign he asked permission from Varus to visit his family, but when this request was granted he instead did a lightning tour of the Germanic tribes and succeeded in uniting them against the Romans – a considerable achievement given that they had been fighting each other for as long as they could remember. When he got back to Varus he falsely told Varus that an uprising had broken out at a particular location, chosen such that the three legions (with their families) would have to string out along a line between a swamp and a mountain to get there. Armin had arranged an ambush along that line, and in several days of fighting all three legions were taken down. A few men including Varus managed to break out on to the plain and form squares, but there were not enough of them and they too were massacred.

            When the news reached Rome, Augustus was appalled. About 1/6 of the Empire’s forces were gone at a stroke. Nothing like that had happened before, and Augustus knew what Armin either didn’t know or didn’t care about, that if Armin had cared to march south then Rome lay undefended, for the other legions were all deployed far away. On the anniversary every year, Augustus fasted and muttered “Varus, Legiones Redde!” i.e., Give me back my Legions.

            Of course, Rome went back in force and took revenge, recapturing the Eagle Standards of the lost legions. Armin, fortunately for him, had died by then. But the episode convinced Rome to set its borders at the Rhine. The history of the Germans would have been very different otherwise.

            The episode was written up by Roman historians, but it was then forgotten in the mists of time. It was remembered in the 16th century when Luther was trying to do spiritually what Armin had done physically, ie free the Germans from Rome. And it was remembered again in the 19th century, when the Germanic States were united into modern Germany by Bismarck, and a monument was put up to commemorate the “Battle of the Teutoburg forest”. The leading German classicist of the era, Mommsen, warned that, based on where Roman coins had been found, the monument was in the wrong place by a hundred miles or so – but Mommsen could not say where the battlefield actually was.

            Then in the 1980s an Officer in the British Army of the Rhine stationed in Osnabruck, Tony Clunn, read the ancient Roman accounts and looked at the landscape with the eye of a soldier, rather than a historian. He went to what he suspected was the place armed with something which nobody had had before, a metal detector. He found abundant Roman coins dating up to the time of the battle but none after it. Bingo! The place is today called Kalkriese and I intend to visit the museum that has since been established there. It is a dark and truly compelling tale.

          • IrishNeanderthal

            Armin — obviously a Romanosceptic.

            But was he all along? I was under the impression that he was originally a Romanophile, but turned against them when he saw what they were doing in his home territory. A parallel to their treatment of Boudicca, maybe, and also their behaviour which, according to Josephus, triggered the uprising of the Jews against Roman rule.

          • Anton

            Maybe – I wrote that from memory (and am even now tightening it a bit!) But it’s SUCH a tale, and when I first heard it I was gripped by it.

          • Chefofsinners

            Gives whole new vistas of meaning to the term Arminian theology.

          • Inspector General

            Recovery of the Imperial Standards was vital, otherwise the legions would always have the taint of shame about them. It also meant legion numbers 17, 18, 19 could be used again at a future date. They never were.

          • bluedog

            Fascinating discovery. One is familiar with the earlier statue of Herman the German.

          • Brian

            The actual phrase in Suetonius is ‘Quintili Vare, legions redde’ (‘Vare’ is the vocative form of ‘Varus’). When I taught Latin a few years ago, I had some German sixth formers (with us for a year) and they enjoyed reading the story of the victory and the subsequent return by the Romans to recover the standards and bury the dead. IIRC, the Cherusci hung Roman heads from trees – not so different from the way Romans could treat their defeated victims. The battle must certainly count as one of those decisive events in history: thus, Gaul was Romanised but Germania wasn’t; and what follows from that is called ‘European (and world) History’ (Clovis is Romanised, Charlemagne’s empire splits into French and German parts, Holy Roman Empire, rise of Kingdom of France …… Napoleon, Prussia vs. France [1815], Prussia vs. France [1870], Germany vs. France [1914], Germany vs. France [1940] ……)

          • Anton

            I’ll give you Vare rather than Varus, but I knowingly edited his name because I wasn’t sure if Augustus muttered both of his forenames. Wasn’t it Quinctilius, though? And surely the plural is Legiones rather than Legions?

          • Brian

            ‘Quintili’ is how Suetonius recorded it. ‘legiones’ is correct – my pre-coffee typing error (now emended).

          • IrishNeanderthal
          • IanCad

            Just a matter of time before the Anti-Trumpers cotton on to that link.

      • Coniston

        There was a fascinating article two months ago by Jonathan Sacks – Cultural Climate Change. The religious – of any religion – will always eventually outnumber the secularists. In Europe, if there is no return to Christianity, Muslims will be taking over (even without any further immigration).
        http://standpointmag.co.uk/node/6938/full

      • @ dannybhoy—Europe’s elites have no interest in what we think. France’s Jacques Attali, interviewed last month about immigration:

        Mais c’est honteux de ne pas accueillir tous ces gens dignes, magnifiques, souvent bien formés, jeunes, pleins de dynamisme. / But it’s shameful not to welcome all these worthy people, magnificent, often well-educated, young, full of dynamism.’

        Tout pays doit se penser comme un hôtel et ses habitants comme des hôteliers. Recevoir sans cesse des étrangers. Etre accueillant. / Every country should think of itself as a hotel and its inhabitants as hoteliers. Receive foreigners without end. Be welcoming.’

        • dannybhoy

          Unbelievable..I just don’t understand the reasoning.

        • Inspector General

          {GASP!}

        • Germany is drowning in violent episodes and Sweden has had 11 bombs in 21 days and not a single word in the MSM for both countries. All we see is how wonderful Frau Merkel is.

          • Anton

            I didn’t see that on Breitbart! Where do you get your info please?

          • From Front Page Britain who post on Facebook, but they got it from HMPO (Hamburger Morgen Post October 24th 2017

            https://www.mopo.de/
            https://www.facebook.com/frontpagebritain/

            The Swedish news from Peter Sweden.

          • @ Marie1797—Sweden is a good example of the power of the media in shaping public opinion. Sweden’s misfortune is that a great deal of her media is in hostile hands, notably those of the Bonnier family (original name Hirschel). For decades, Swedes have had no respite from the multicultural propaganda machine and they have dutifully voted for the extinction of their civilization.

        • Anton

          Let’s check the translation. What is the French for dynamite?

          • jaundicedi

            gatesofvienna.net is an excellent website with many translated interviews and television clips from across Europe

  • SonoView

    I thought he was dead, until I spotted him at the local groceries emporium last week.

    • betteroffoutofit

      So long as we can hear his voice . .. he’s not dead yet 🙂 Mind you, I have heard some recordings in your ’emporia’ that purported to be him but had been messed with until unrecognisable. If he’d sounded like that, he’d never have got anywhere!

    • Brian

      He was dead – but then his heart was strangely warmed.

    • Chefofsinners
      • Manfarang

        I didn’t see him in Foodland.

      • SonoView

        I cannot see Mrs. Proudie visiting such an uncouth emporium. Cut price fags indeed!

  • dannybhoy

    ““Well I’m taking no chances! That colonial fellow is not getting his sweaty palms on my groats,” he mumbled.

    As if he’d want to – at least not without gloves.”

    “where the talented folk singer Elvis Wesley was about to perform”
    Gems..

    “It struck me then how much time and effort we Christians waste on disputes within the faith, focusing on trivia and ignoring the bigger picture. ”
    One of our greatest failings Mrs Proudie..
    ” My denomination is righter than your denomination! Our jammy dodgers are more popular than your hobnobs…”
    And all the while UK Christendom is mouldering towards oblivion..
    Do we take it that Mr Slope is sulking somewhere unsavoury?

    • Manfarang

      Elvis

  • Chefofsinners

    I see that Mr Felon has been joined on the list of dishonourables by Charlie Elphucke, member for benDover.
    Meanwhile on the Labour benches Clive Lewdis and Kelvin Hotkinks have also come under pressure, so to speak. All four became quite excited at the prospect of being suspended, saying they usually have to claim for that sort of thing on their expenses.

    • Manfarang

      A bi-polar political system. A party of militant gropers v a party of militant feminists.

      • Chefofsinners

        I have no idea which is which.

        • Manfarang

          Gropers bluish v feminists reddish

          • Chefofsinners

            And yet we are currently being treated to The Hunt for Red Octopus, starring Harriet Harperson.

          • Manfarang

            Ridiculously unfunny.(Harman that is)

          • Brian

            All they’ll get is crabs.

          • Manfarang

  • Sarky

    He was a follower of Martin Luther Vandross.

  • Manfarang

    “All I want is to know the truth, to know and experience God. I’m a searcher, that’s what I’m all about.”
    The Seeker King: A Spiritual Biography of Elvis Presley by Gary Tillery

  • Inspector General

    Readers who enjoy Mrs Proudie’s regular amusings might want to continue in the same vein by following the link below. Pink News has an interview with Vince Cabal and he’s used it to reassure that militant gays aspirations, wants and desires ( of the never ending, eternal sort) are back in the number one place as reasons the Lib Dem party exists. Vince, bless him, even uses the word ‘detox’ to explain his repair of the damage inflicted on the great and noble party during the cruel Farron regime…

    http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2017/11/03/sir-vince-cable-we-need-to-detoxify-the-lib-dems-for-lgbt-voter

    • Hi Inspection générale des gays,

      I saw this Mr Cholmondley- Warner documentary and thought of you :

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tQWPR9TM0Gk

      • Inspector General

        Free detox available from the Illiberal-Undemocrats (sorry Vince, but you have a bloody nerve to identify with democracy having wanted the referendum result set aside) for you or anybody else who doesn’t trust their own liver and kidneys to do the job. Airhead women, mainly.

        • Hi Inspection générale ,

          Mind you, isn’t it bumfire night tonight? Certainly there’s a smell of burning wood and gunpowder in the air ..maybe jacket potatoes too…. lots of fireworks and as always our pets are upset.

          • Inspector General

            Old Sarey popped in earlier and placed the Inspector on newspaper for the duration, Hannah. Suggest you do similar with your pets…

          • Hi

            In addition to sawdust and straw, we use the Financial Times as bedding : they absolutely love shredding the top layers and the rest is absolutely thoroughly absorbent for rabbit wee and poo pellets….

          • Manfarang

            A few days ago it was the Loy Krathong festival in Thailand. People set off a few fireworks too
            https://www.google.com/doodles/loy-krathong-2017

          • Hi

            Also who is Old Sarey ?

          • Inspector General

            Old Sarey is what the Inspector’s illegal Mexican immigrant of a man servant wishes to be known as instead of Hernandez. Says he wants to transition just like everyone else, but in reality the UK Border Agency are closing in. There are two armed detectives from Scotland Yard in hat and raincoat outside. Hernandez having already sworn not to be taken alive…

          • Hi Inspection générale ,

            So I guess he speaks English , learned from a booock and a talking moose?

            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5035TY5RSpg

        • Manfarang

          A number off British people were denied a vote in the referendum. Hardly proper democracy.

      • dannybhoy

        I love Cholmondley-Warner skits!
        Here’s another favourite..
        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LS37SNYjg8w

      • IrishNeanderthal

        Hannah,

        Something for you to enjoy, based on Gerard Hoffnung:

        Now to wind down for Domingo (un plácido, I hope.)

        • IanCad

          Thanks Pat, for that link which leads to his classic:

  • Chefofsinners

    In defence of the defence secretary, his actions weren’t a crime, although they were a Fallonknee.

    • Inspector General

      You have a keen sense of humour, chief. My dear chap, you should have mentioned that…

      (For more jolliarity, do take out the word ‘crime’ and insert misdemeanour. Don’t ask why…)

      • Chefofsinners

        Why?

        • Manfarang

          A felony is a crime.

          • Chefofsinners

            Ah. So what is the difference between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’?

          • Manfarang

            Ah synonyms. I would translate both into Thai as pit gotmai (ผิดกฏหมาย),

          • Chefofsinners

            No, no. Unlawful means against the law. Illegal is a sick bird.

          • Manfarang

            Ho ho ho. I will try that one with my colleagues.

          • IanCad

            Also the name of an unlawful fireworks stand on Hwy 101 in Washington State run by some Quinault Indians: ” Ill Eagle Fireworks” 100yds ahead.

  • not a machine

    Oh Mrs Proudie I choked on my afternoon tea cake and fruit conserve.. Elvis Wesley indeed, only the front cover of the nations favourite weekly satirical magazine the parfumdelasewer made my dark funny bone jiggle as much 🙂

  • What a dark world:

    UN Human Rights Committee formally excludes unborn child from ‘right to life’

    Despite pleas from more than one hundred governments and pro-life organizations, including the United States and Poland, the UN Human Rights Committee has excluded unborn children from the right to life in international law this week in Geneva.

    “I was worried for a minute we would discuss the word limit for separate opinions,” joked Yuval Shany. The Israeli law professor was mocking pro-life concerns as the committee rushed through a second reading of a controversial draft commentary on the right to life in what is perhaps the most important UN human rights treaty.

    Shany, who has been in charge of the draft for two years, knew there would be no dissent. The 18 members of the committee that records the state efforts to implement the treaty unanimously agreed on a text that in some respects is more extreme than the previous one.

    The committee added language about access to abortion not just being a right under the covenant, but that it must also be “affordable” and “effective,” as abortion groups recommended to the committee. U.S. law professor Sarah Cleveland said this was needed to make it easier for rape victims to obtain abortions.

    No expert expressed concern for children in the womb capable of feeling pain, or brought up the Convention on the Rights of the Child, which expressly requires states to protect children “before birth.”

    “I am very sensitive to my conscience,” said Mauro Politi at one point. The Italian professor’s conscience was not troubled by abortion itself, but the need to ensure women are able to abort their unborn children in cases of rape, disability, or when a mother’s life is at risk.

    “Of course, we have agreed that it is up to states to make the determination of when life begins,” said German professor Anja Seibert-Fohr—the only member of the committee who advised caution about imposing a right to abortion, pointing to the European Court of Human Rights as a model.

    “States do have some discretion,” agreed Shany. “We do not want to touch the issue of late-term abortions.”

    The Japanese Chair of the committee, Yuji Iwasawa was in a hurry and appeared impatient. He insisted these issues had already been discussed though there is no public record of those discussions.

    The committee barely flinched as the United States, Russia, Egypt, Japan, Poland, and others denied the committee’s authority to read a right to abortion into the treaty.

    The treaty is a “living instrument” said French professor Olivier de Frouville. Along with Shany, he pointed out how the committee and UN treaty bodies routinely insist on a right to abortion.

    The only snag for the committee was not from sovereign States but another part of the UN bureaucracy. The UN committee on disabilities asked that the draft be changed to avoid expressions that demean the disabled. Iwasawa indicated that he had met with the Chair of the disabilities committee, and implied that the disabilities committee would be fine with referring to abortion for “non-viable” pregnancies as opposed to abortion for fatally “impaired” fetuses.

    The second reading is expected to continue in March. The committee has yet to reach the issue of euthanasia, which is currently considered an obligation in the draft commentary.

    https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/un-human-rights-committee-formally-excludes-unborn-child-from-right-to-life

    When adopted will this be binding on sovereign nation states?

    While not a treaty itself, the Declaration was explicitly adopted for the purpose of defining the meaning of the words “fundamental freedoms” and “human rights” appearing in the United Nations Charter, which is binding on all member states. For this reason, the Universal Declaration of Human Rights is a fundamental constitutive document of the United Nations. In addition, many international lawyers[33] believe that the Declaration forms part of customary international law[34] and is a powerful tool in applying diplomatic and moral pressure to governments that violate any of its articles. The 1968 United Nations International Conference on Human Rights advised that the Declaration “constitutes an obligation for the members of the international community” to all persons. The Declaration has served as the foundation for two binding UN human rights covenants: the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights and the International Covenant on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights. The principles of the Declaration are elaborated in international treaties such as the International Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Racial Discrimination, the International Convention on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women, the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, the United Nations Convention Against Torture, and many more. The Declaration continues to be widely cited by governments, academics, advocates, and constitutional courts, and by individuals who appeal to its principles for the protection of their recognised human rights.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Universal_Declaration_of_Human_Rights#Legal_effect

    • Sheer wickedness!
      ‘The life unlived and the races unrun they slew’— Aeschylus, c.460 BC.

    • IanCad

      Truly Jack; Man has appointed himself Lord of all. We were given dominion over the beasts of the field but ourselves we are leading to damnation.

    • Royinsouthwest

      How very convenient. I don’t suppose journalists from the mainstream media will be queuing up to question members of the UN Human Rights Committee about their motives, will they?

      “Human rights” are becoming as bogus as the democracy in the so-called German Democratic Republic was. We have already seen in Britain that as “humsn rights” increase freedom decreases. “Equality” as promoted by Harriet Harman is equally bogus.

  • bluedog

    Excellent, Mrs P. Better than Private Eye and one doesn’t have to pay £1.80 a week for the privilege.

    • Manfarang

      You maybe interested to know that Thailand and the United Kingdom are holding a joint military exercise, codenamed “Panther Gold 2017”, in Kanchanaburi. The UK Army is deploying 120 troops from the Light Role Infantry Company, the 1st Battalion Irish Guard, to take part in the drill. Thai forces have sent 300 troops to take part in the drill, 220 of which are from the 9th Infantry Division, including 120 rifle company soldiers.

      • Royinsouthwest

        Isn’t Kanchanaburi the place where the infamous bridge over the River Kwai was built in the Second World War?

        • Manfarang

          Yes indeed. The Burma Siam railway. The bridge in fact is rather small.
          There are two war cemeteries there.

      • bluedog

        Why on earth are we sending troops there? It can only be for jungle warfare training, but there would be better ways of doing this that do not raise unrealistic expectations.

        • CliveM

          What expectations?

          • bluedog

            One would think that a gesture such as joint exercises might encourage thoughts of greater commitment. The existing commitment is FPDA, which would be hard enough for the UK to honour. Mission-creep up the Malay peninsular to Siam would appear to be redundant, given that we no longer need to think in terms of the defence of India. The immediate objective is retention of Singapore within the Western orbit.

        • Manfarang

          Cultural awareness and jungle warfare The Thai military sends a lot of its personnel to the US for training (there is the annual Cobra Gold Thai US exercise) but also some to Australia and a few to the UK.
          With the AEC there is not much chance of conflict between the SE Asian nations although there is a threat from Islamic extremism.
          It is important for Britain to have very good relations and increase its trade with Thailand.

  • IanCad

    Madam, I have read you since Year One. A tight race to be sure, but this glorious overview of the recent goings-on in your dorp emerges by a nose from a field of true thoroughbreds.
    Thank you for many smiles, chuckles, belly laughs, and occasional bouts of sheer, murderous rage.

  • Manfarang

    Anyway todays sermon at the Church of Peace was about Noah (No-an as they pronounce it) and the flood. Did Noah really live for 950 years or 95?

    • Chefofsinners

      Building the ark took 100 years. That seems a reasonable timescale. So he probably lived more than 95.

      • Inspector General

        The ‘great flood’ was caused by the melting icecaps in North America and Russia. The sheer volume of released water gave rise to the Mediterranean sea. There was no ark. You would need to be an imbecile to believe there was…

        • Sarky

          There was localised flooding caused by the volcano on Santorini. Locals used coracles to save and transport livestock away.
          Not a great stretch to see where the story came from.

          • Chefofsinners

            Remarkable how you two are such experts, since you weren’t there.

            These are the words of Jesus (who was there) from Matthew 24:
            “as the days of Noah were, so shall also the coming of the Son of man be. For as in the days that were before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark, and knew not until the flood came, and took them all away; so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.”

          • Sarky

            You can’t use a story to prove a story. Show me the scientific evidence for a worldwide flood. Show me the evidence that an ark could actually be constructed.
            Show me how people and animals could actually breathe, when the flood waters were higher than the highest mountain??

            Come on prove it.

          • bluedog

            If the water level rises to that of the highest mountain, that level is sea level at which point the atmosphere is at its densest.

          • Sarky

            Sorry. I dismiss anything to do with Ken Ham immediately.

          • So you ask for evidence and then don’t look at it when it is given.
            ‘Nuff said, I think.

          • Sarky

            This so called evidence has been disproven time and time again. Why would i waste my time going over it again??

          • carl jacobs

            You can if the story possesses authority.

          • Chefofsinners

            Try a thought experiment: If it was true, how would you expect the world to look?

          • Sarky

            I would expect a fossil layer with thousands of humans and animals intermingled……which doesnt exist.

          • Chefofsinners

            Would you? Might not the humans be far fewer in number if, as the bible says, the earth teemed with animal life from the moment of creation whereas humans started from just two? And might not those few humans be more resourceful than animals in fleeing the rising waters?

          • Sarky

            Thats not what the bible said happened though is it?

          • Chefofsinners

            Yes it is. The only supposition is the bit about the humans outside the ark being more resourceful in fleeing flood waters than the animals.

          • Sarky

            Thats the bit i was talking about.

          • Inspector General

            Before said flood, what is now the Mediterranean was split in two. Two large landlocked lakes or small seas either side of a land bridge from Italy to North Africa. Beyond Sicily the highest points of that bridge are still above water. The Islands that make up Malta. These islands are not volcanic in origin.

          • Royinsouthwest

            Did they get the coracles from Wales?

          • Inspector General

            Your livestock is your wealth. Today, the Inspector was researching the part Gloucester played in the English Civil War. Held by Parliamentarians and besieged by a Royalist army ten times the size, a relief column was dispatched by Cromwell from a small village west of London called Heathrow. The locals got wind of this move and by the time the column arrived, not a single example of livestock could be found in the immediate, lest it be stolen and butchered to feed aforementioned relief column.

          • bluedog

            One wonders how the Michelin rated restaurants of the Upper Thames would have managed the arrival of the Parliamentarian brutal and licentious.

          • There are ancient accounts of floods to be found among other peoples as well as in Genesis. Rather than discounting the reality of the Flood, these are corroborative. The presence of multiple accounts of some incredible flood in ancient times argues in favour of such an occurrence, rather than assuming they all borrow from each other.

        • carl jacobs

          Somehow, the idea of being called an Imbecile by the Inspector is not something that fills me with existential dread.

        • If Jesus and Saints Peter and Paul believed in Noah and the ark, that’s good enough for Jack.

          • len

            Well said Jack….This time at least 😉

      • Manfarang

        Well he was a vegetarian. (the righteous didn’t eat meat before the flood)

  • Father David

    Here’s me thinking that all this sort of thing had been sorted out under MacMillan when Mr. Profumo was forced to resign for conduct inappropriate.

    • bluedog

      Wasn’t the precise ‘conduct inappropriate’ misleading the Parliament?

      Boys will be boys and hopefully, girls will always be girls. As Charles Moore points out in the DT/ST, the current purge is highly prejudicial to men, who by nature tend to take the initiative in romantic liaisons. It’s a good thing JFK wasn’t a member of a cabinet run by the likes of Mrs Dismay. If male libido is to be completely proscribed in government circles, yet another profound cultural transformation is at hand, all in the name of equality. But really Sir Michael, Mrs Leadsom?

      • Royinsouthwest

        I know it is a worldly thing to say but the temptation for politicians was much more obvious in the hey-day of Christine Keeler and Mandy Rice Davies.

        When I was at school all of us teenage boys could understand Profumo’s behaviour. I very much doubt if the average teenage boy today has much empathy for or envy of any misbehaving MP.

        • bluedog

          You may have a point. It was recently explained to this communicant that the trend towards co-ed has resulted in a different and more relaxed relationship between the sexes. On the other hand, within the hot-house atmosphere of HM Submarines, it seems to be business as usual.

      • Father David

        I think that with regard to Mr. Profumo you are correct in your assertion. I’m sure that the vicar’s daughter will sort out her M Ps and, in future, we can all look forward to a squeaky clean Cabinet.
        Mrs. Leadsom makes me somewhat doubt the phrase “Cold hands, warm heart”

        • bluedog

          May the Good Lord be praised! Once again we seem to be in general agreement. Alas, the day of the Alpha Female is at hand and resistance is futile. Moral castration at the brusque and matronly insistence of our dominatrices would appear to be our lot. If the Conservative cabinet is in thrall to a cabal of May, Rudd and Leadsom, one can envisage a leakage of working-class votes to any masculine opponent, even the ageing Corbyn.

          • Father David

            What a terrifying triad – May, Rudd and Leadsom – the mere mention of their names sends a shiver up my spine. I wouldn’t like to meet any one of them up a darkened alley for surely, emasculation would be guaranteed!.

          • bluedog

            Reading Rudd’s comments about ‘cleaning out’, one realises that so begins the Gender Cleansing of the British government. Electorally catastrophic.

          • Father David

            I thought that it was the smiling Scottish lady – Ruth Davidson that spoke about clearing out the Augean Stables?

          • bluedog

            Rudd doesn’t seem to use classical allegories, preferring the more utilitarian ‘cleaning’. No nonsense gal who responds to her mistress’ voice.

          • Father David

            Indeed, she even has her eye on taking over from Theresa but her majority is so small at Hastings that her future looks precarious to say the least.