mrs proudie
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Crime up 13%? Police are too busy tracking down hate-criminals who plot against Common Purpose, diversity and equality

Good heavens! A headmaster at an Anglican school has banned a Christian group from taking assemblies, simply because a small band of lemon-sucking Guardianistas decided to raise their scrawny necks and complain? The Dutt-Paukers of this world have a lot to answer for, but the more we give into their incessant demands the more intolerable life becomes for the majority. We brook no such nonsense at Dr. Wortle’s School: I’m pleased to say each morning begins with a recital of the catechism and ends with the beatings… whoops, I mean the Beatitudes. Of course, we do try to keep up with the times without jumping on band wagons: next week the School Managers are meeting to decide upon the implementation of the Revised Code.

The Jupiter reported last week that Her Majesty has decided to take more of a back seat in royal duties and ceremonial, an acknowledgement of a long life of service and advancing years. One senses things will never be the same, a fin de règne, in the same way the smell of wood smoke heralds the onset of autumn. Will we feel the same about her successor? If past form is anything to go by, it will be a very different sort of monarch, and perhaps even monarchy. Signora Vesey Neroni was all too eager to share her opinions during the interval of Die Fledermaus, currently being performed at the Theatre Royal, Barchester, by the Dr. Barnardo’s Old Boys Operatic Minstrel Ensemble, conducted by Sir Parzifal Thightrembler with Dame Cecily Brylcreem on gin and triangle (Sir Parzifal had a very impressive podium which was much admired by all present).

“It may well be time to consider a republic,” she twittered behind her fan.

Honestly, send a perfectly formed English rose to live a while in sunny Italy and she is beguiled by a Garibaldi and comes back legless.

“The stout yeomen of this sceptred isle would never stand for such nonsense,” I retorted, just as the orchestra struck up and we waltzed into Act Two – but then the thought occurred to me that those same yeomen might vote Comrade Corbyn in one day. When the chips are down, who knows which way they’ll swing?

I stopped off at the Wednesday market to buy some fish for my Lord’s Friday supper. Mr. Codswalloper, the fishmonger, was of cheerful disposition and eager to converse.

“It looks like we will be getting our fishing grounds back when we leave this ‘ere foreign empire,” he chortled as he prodded his chub in an effort to stimulate my interest. I was after haddock, so his actions were of no avail.

“It remains to be seen,” I replied. Indeed it does, for Whitehall would trade the Crown Jewels and more beside if it could pick up a few crumbs from Mr. Juncker’s table. There is no honour amongst thieves, nor in the corridors of power.

We get our fish fresh from the docks here in Barchester, for it has been an inland port since medieval times. It is said King Edward II once dangled his rod here whilst entertaining his favourite, Piers Gavescon, behind the sand dunes. The little ships bob in and out, casting their nets this way and that. Why, even Mr. Slope has been known to go trawling with Jolly Jack Tars whilst doing a stint at the Seaman’s Mission: I believe he caught crabs.

“Well, I am sure the Prime Minister will pull out all the stops,” said Mr. Codswalloper.

I had no idea the PM could play the Hammond organ. As for Tereason May fighting our corner, forget it. The Appeaser appears to have caved in, which some of us knew would happen all along. The woman wants to defend ‘the deal’ before the public: she should be defending herself at the Old Bailey on charges of lèse-nation (that’s a bit of your actual French).

My Lord the Bishop and I were invited to a charity fund raiser organised by the Archdeacon on Thursday evening. He is proposing to erect a statue to Mr. Viktor Orban in Magna Carta Square, paid partly by public subscription. It seems a worthy cause.

“Mr. Orban is the beacon to which all freedom-loving peoples should flock,” explained the Archdeacon, raising his glass of Madeira in homage to the great man. “Thanks to him, Hungary has not experienced the same sort of violence and slaughter that we have in London and Manchester, and Hungarians are not embarrassed to champion their own culture and traditions!”

Lots of applause at this point.

“Now I know some amongst you are wondering why I am not putting forward the name of a contemporary politician from these islands for such a prestigious honour… the thing is, I cannot think of one! Not one of them care a jot for the British people – too busy virtue-signalling in support of every swarthy souk-dweller, bearded brigand and ISIS worshipper who sets foot on these shores claiming they’re six years old but a bit big for their age. Oh, they make a point of telling us to open our doors and take these fellows in, but have they? How many of the blighters are enjoying eggs sunnyside-up for breakfast at Yvette Cooper’s mansion, one wonders?’

I coughed discreetly: “You may have overlooked Mr. Rees-Mogg, Archdeacon.”

“As indeed has the nation, lady. But he is as yet a mere backbencher, untried and untested, whilst Mr. Orban carries the torch of Sobieski and Prince Eugene.”

One cannot argue with that – or the Archdeacon.

Nor can one argue with these figures: ‘England Policing Crisis: Crime up 13 Per Cent, Rape up 22 Per Cent, Just One in Nine Burglaries Solved.’ This was the headline in today’s Jupiter, and I must say I was shocked. Fortified by an extra hobnob or two, I decided to go immediately to Barchester Police Station and demand an explanation. Constable Knapweed was on the desk, but there was no point talking to the monkey – I demanded to see the organ-grinder.

Inspector Bertram D. Cuffem ignored my protestations and, when I’d calmed down, gave the official explanation.

“You see, Mrs. Proudie, it all boils down to resources. Thanks to our rudderless leadership at the Home Office, we haven’t so much as a spare farthing to spend on crime stopping as it used to be done. All our time and effort now is directed towards tracking down hate-criminals, those evil-twisted souls who plot and mutter against Common Purpose, diversity and equality. We have to steam open every letter posted in Barchester and check for dangerous content; every telegram sent has to be relayed back here to HQ for political vetting; every piece of graffiti appearing on walls scanned for wrong-think then whitewashed over. A policeman’s lot is not a happy one, I can assure you.”

Well, he looked very happy about it, I must say. Why pound the beat and risk life and limb when you can nab Mrs Snooks of Rose Cottage for singing ‘Baa Baa Black Sheep’ to her grandson?

How did we come to this?

Well, dear hearts, I must fly. I have promised to visit my old friend Hermione Possett at Great Throbbing-in-the-Meadows, where her husband is rector. She is setting up a protest group, ‘Clergy Wives Against Gary Lineker,’ which seems another worthy cause. So, as the Eisteddfod of Depravity gathers together the druids of Chatham House and the denizens of Dignitas prepare to receive the Conservative Party en masse, I bid you adieu.

  • michaelkx

    Madam once again you have put the state of this blessed land in to a picture Mr Constable would be proud of. As for the Church in most of this Land, I refer you to Revelation’s 3: 14 to 18. just about sums it up.
    PS, that should start the conversation.

  • Inspector General

    Good day to you Mrs Proudie.

    Take comfort that the out of control crime situation seems to be almost entirely confined to Londinistan and other culturally enriched cities. God bless our political parties of all shades for arranging this. Isn’t ‘democracy’ marvellous…

  • John

    Yes, the crime figures are up a little bit but this is but a minor detail. If the police concentrate their efforts on shutting down free thought and getting everyone to think the same we will become like North Korea – where there is no discernible crime at all.

  • Father David

    I’m not so sure that it will be a very different kind of monarchy under Charles III or will it be George VII? It could well be back to the 1950s which would be no bad thing (rickets excluded).
    I like the thought of your stout yeomen considering voting for Mr. Corbyn – a thought that has now become a distinct possibility.
    Isn’t “fishmonger” a delightful word? One of my 16th century predecessors was named William Fleshmonger,D D; described as a “rank pluralist” – he became Dean of Chichester in 1526.

    • David

      “Fleshmonger” sounds more like a butcher !

      • Father David

        Precisely so.

      • In modern vernacular the word rhymes with limp.

    • 1518 until 1541, also known as Doctor Foster?
      One remembers him well.

      • Father David

        In addition to his duties at Chichester – he didn’t by any chance on one occasion go to Gloucester and vowed never to go there again?

        • Perhaps you should return suited attired in waterproofs to exorcise any trauma the poor man still suffers, offering this as atonement and thereby securing his release him from purgatorial cleansing. The Inspector will gladly assist. He’s local and familiar with the spirit world in the locale.

          • Father David

            I think that it is now more P C to refer to it as Ministry of Deliverance rather than exorcism.

  • Anton

    Anyone else read the Coppersblog a decade ago? About a man who joined the police to catch criminals but found himself acting nearly all the time as a glorified social worker and paper-pusher.

    If Social Worker was a genuine profession then it would exist in private practice.

    • dannybhoy

      Yes, I vaguely remember that chap. Quite droll as I recall..

    • Terry Mushroom

      Was he the one who spoke a bit too much truth to power?

      Have just discovered Inspector Gadget on Twitter.

    • Jon of GSG

      It does! I met one last week.

    • There are numerous independent social workers operating privately in the UK. If your looking for one, here’s a directory:

      http://www.baswindependents.co.uk/

      • Anton

        O I see. The outsourcing trend has reached social working, a profession which began entirely in government. I wonder how much of their income drives from local and national government?

        I don;’t notice any in the Mosaic system, and you wouldn’t notice any in the feudal system of which you think so highly.

        [Subject change: the problem with the feudal system was landowning by a tiny privileged minority. All else flowed from that.]

        • You were wrong about there being no private social work practitioners. Jack was merely correcting your misinformation. Not really sure just what relevance the Mosaic or Feudal systems have to this factual error – or the cause of the peasant revolts.

          Why are you waving your arms around and trying to change the subject? Surely it’s not because you want to turn your captious eye to this group? Before doing so, Jack suggests you do a little bit of research about the subject.

          • Anton

            I am widening the subject to take in other matters of relevance which you would prefer not to be raised, clearly.

          • How re these “other matters” in any way “relevant” to whether or there are or are not private social workers in the UK?

            It’s not a case of “prefer(ring)” them “not to be raised”. Clearly, that’s your captious nature showing again. Would you like Jack to recommend a good local independent psychologist or social worker to help you address this?

          • Anton

            I am widening the subject to take in other matters of relevance to the questionable profession of social worker; matters which you would prefer not to be raised, clearly.

          • Nah, it’s just Jack finds exchanges with you rather tedious and unfruitful. Just so you know, Jack frowns upon the so called “professionalisation” of social work and considers this group of workers a necessary evil in Western societies.

  • Anton

    People go on about how the Army is now too small. It probably is but building up the Navy is a much more important priority, since we are an island and we need to defend our fishing grounds from the rest of the EU and defend our shores from illegal migrants on boats.

    • Manfarang

      A Cod war eh? I remember how the last one turned out.

      • Royinsouthwest

        The Icelanders were defending their own waters, with Viking spirit. Do you really think that we should not defend our own? Some people don’t. During the EU Referendum campaign Bob Geldof and a bunch of privileged snobs hired a large boat, drank champagne, and hurled abuse at fishermen sailing up the Thames is support of Brexit and their livelihoods.

        • Manfarang

          They were unilateral extending their waters Iceland achieved its overall aims. As a result, the already declining British fisheries were hit hard by being excluded from their prime fishing grounds, and the economies of the large northern fishing ports in the United Kingdom, such as Grimsby, Hull, and Fleetwood, were severely affected, with thousands of skilled fishermen and people in related trades being put out of work.
          Iceland has been affected by a general decline in fishing yields in the Northeast Atlantic, with a one-way decrease of 18% from 2003 to 2009, although this trend appears to have been halted or reversed lately.

        • Terry Mushroom

          I suspect the sight of these rich, soft handed inebriates shouting at the lower classes helped to clinch some Leavers’ votes if not dissuade them.

          What they apparently don’t get about Rees-Mogg’s appeal – despite his apparent upper class ways – is his honesty. The true upper classes have often related well to the lower orders, as Mrs Proudie will testify, I’m sure.

      • Chefofsinners

        Cod be with you.

        • Manfarang

          Chips, fried mushrooms, and mushy peas thanks.

    • vsscoles

      The MoD is spending all its resources on just two aircraft carriers, each of which is a sitting duck when out at sea. To pay for this the Army and the RAF – and the Marines – are being sacrificed.

      • Chefofsinners

        We’ll need a pound of Army&Navy, and a few Gobstoppers for the French.

    • Chefofsinners

      Europeans, know your plaice.

  • bluedog

    A busy time for celebrations looms, Mrs P, with something for everyone in the offing. One can only be impressed by the Archdeacon’s plan to commemorate the achievements of the great Victor Orban in the form of a statue. But Heavens, there are so many different people to please and one respectfully suggests a multi-purpose plinth on which to erect statues of the notables du jour. For example, later this week, on the 25th October, our colleagues on the Far Left will give thanks for the 100th anniversary of the October Revolution, lighting candles in memory of VI Lenin. No sooner has Mr Lenin’s effigy been consigned to the dustbin of history than it will be time to erect a statue of Martin Luther, ready for the 500th anniversary of his launch of the Reformation on 31st October. One somehow doubts that the latter date will get a mention on the BBC.

    • Carlotta

      Much as I dislike the BBC’s take on most things, they did a splendid job this week on BBC 4 with some four or five programmes on Luther and aspects of the Reformation in UK – Tyndale, Cranmer, etc etc. I was most pleasantly surprised – a veritable feast.

      • bluedog

        One stands corrected, Ma’am.

      • layreader

        Well, it has to be said that they tried. David Starkey’s was by far the best, having the virtues of accuracy and scholarship; one was all in German, and being a drama, was not well acquainted with the facts; and one was presented by a gushing Goth whose screen manner I found very off-putting.
        But Hallowe’en is the real reason the BBC celebrates October 31st, and you will find rather more air time devoted to that.

        • Carlotta

          I agree – the gushing Goth was a little off-putting. She did a lot of walking away.

      • Manfarang

        Did the BBC mention ‘Von den Juden und Ihren Lügen’

        • Carlotta

          No idea – I didn’t watch. It was a German production with subtitles and a warning for sensitive viewers. I am such a sensitive soul – not. I was a suffeoldring soul but with a cold. Perhaps iplayer when I feel stronger 🙂

          • Carlotta

            suffering soul – that surely wasn’t predictive text!

    • Royinsouthwest

      The 25th October is certainly worth celebrating as it is the 602nd anniversary of the Battle of Agincourt. I’m sure the BBC will remind the Brexit negotiators of its significance just as they will surely remind everyone that today, the 21st of October, is the 212th anniversary of the Battle of Trafalgar and Monday, 23rd October, will be the 75th anniversary of the Battle of Alamein.

  • Skidger

    The police are too busy painting their fingernails blue and wearing bunny outfits to be bothered with actually catching criminals.

    • David

      And too busy monitoring so called “hate crimes” which are often little more than people exercising their now threatened freedom of speech and therefore opinion. This can be done sitting in front of screens which is so much more congenial that investigating and collaring real criminals.
      Unless bloggers directly incite criminal acts we should be free to express our opinions and even insult others, as it all part of a process of vigorous debate necessary to maintain a democracy. May the best ideas win in the market place of ideas !

      • Bernard from Bucks

        Someone aptly described them on Twitter as ‘social workers with Tasers’.

  • David

    Thank you indeed Mrs Proudie for yet another witty and succinct summary of the week’s offerings.
    A statue to Mr Victor Orban sounds like a truly excellent idea ! All us freedom fighters and upholders of Christian values will contribute I’m sure.

  • SonoView

    Madam

    I find your comments on Victor Orban deeply offensive (although I am not entirely sure who he is or what he stands for, or why all free-loving people should flock to him).

    Free love is a deeply despicable thing and even contemplating it triggers the most unpleasant emotions in me, and I hold you totally responsible for this. If I should do something unpleasant to myself it will be entirely your fault.

    You must be a deeply bigoted and phobic person, and if you attempt to speak publicly at the Snowflake platform in my town I will ensure that your voice is drowned out by shouts of, “Abolish free love, go home to your vile den of infamy”.

    • layreader

      No irony, please. I find it very confusing. But perhaps it’s not irony…

  • Inspector General

    Just to let you all know…

    Today, the Inspector has chosen to self identify as a man.

    Who knows what tomorrow will bring…

    That’s all. Carry on chaps…

    • Tout Va

      Zut alors! Poop in an see moi bieg booy.

      • dannybhoy

        Linus??

        • Tout Va

          Wot ‘av yoo dun to ze pour boy? E weel nut stoop crwin.

          • dannybhoy

            Crwin.?
            Tears of conviction and repentance Danny hopes….

          • Tout Va

            E is, ow you sae, sookin is fum and soolkin.

          • dannybhoy

            Hm.
            Coodbe wurst I suppose..

          • Tout Va

            Wurst? E woont evin share ‘is sausage wiv moi, not evan a little nibble.

    • SonoView

      Well heaven forfend that you should attempt to enter the gentlemen’s locker room, who knows what might confront you. Make sure you take some smelling salts in case you should feel faint.

    • Sarky

      Wow. that’s a stretch.

      • dannybhoy

        You think?

        • Please. That’s asking too much!

          • dannybhoy

            Pah!
            Inspector TransGenderal ???

          • Inspector Neanderthal.

          • dannybhoy

            Mine’s better.
            (Reaches for anti-quibble inhaler)

          • Have the nebuliser fully loaded and on standby ….

          • IrishNeanderthal

            He’s an Ig, not an Ug.

    • Happy Jackie

      Jackie is thinking of reverting and any spare parts you have no further use for will be gratefully received. Are you a registered organ donor?

      • writhledshrimp

        Happy Jack wasn’t old, but he was a man

        He lived in the sand at the Isle of Man

        The kids would all sing, he would take the wrong key

        So they rode on his head on their furry donkey

        • Manfarang

          (I saw ya!)

        • Happy Jackie

          Is your shrimp really wrinkled? Must be terribly embarrassing. Mind it doesn’t get barbecued.

          The Who were prisoners of the patriarchal, sexist, misogynist, homophobic and transphobic culture ….. but Roger… oh Roger …. he was to die for. What did they know of Jackie’s true inner self and her yearnings?

          “I’m free
          I’m free
          And freedom tastes of reality
          I’m free
          I’m free
          An’ I’m waiting for you to follow Jackie.”

          Transgenders of the World, Unite! You have nothing to lose but your …… well, we go into that before the watershed.

          PS … are you married?

    • Hi Inspector

      “Carry on chaps…” seems quite discriminatory…

      • Only if you’re thinking in binary concepts, Hannah.

    • The Duke of Umberland, England

      Superb!

  • dannybhoy

    ” Signora Vesey Neroni was all too eager to share her opinions during the interval of Die Fledermaus, currently being performed at the Theatre Royal, Barchester, by the Dr. Barnardo’s Old Boys Operatic Minstrel Ensemble, conducted by Sir Parzifal Thightrembler with Dame Cecily Brylcreem on gin and triangle (Sir Parzifal had a very impressive podium which was much admired by all present).”
    Classic British farce materiel Mrs Proudie, combining earthy humour with keen political insight.
    Vesey Neroni conjures up all sorts of images, chief of which (for me) hails from that excellent film “Holes”..

  • the thing is, I cannot think of one! Not one of them care a jot for the British people

    Perhaps the Archdeacon simply didn’t think very hard or perhaps favourable mentions of Nick Griffin are now forbidden by law and His Grace would be hauled off by the police. Griffin patently cares for the British which, as any fule kno, makes him a racist, a xenophobe, a fascist, a Nazi, a white supremacist, an anti-Semite and an eater of babies (sliced and lightly grilled).

    • Manfarang

      And a pig farmer.

  • dannybhoy

    Ho-kay,
    I have been somewhat distracted with other events this last week, but it has not escaped my eagle eye that our talented and kosher Jewish friend Avi has been missing in recent weeks.
    Anyone know why?
    Avi, if you’re out there in cyberspace come back and visit us. As the sign says at Lod Airport..
    “Hurry back – we miss you already!”

    • Manfarang

      Lod Airport!
      (it is located in an unincorporated area within the Central District of Israel)

      • dannybhoy

        Showoff…
        Although ani lo meveen mah ata mitcaveen l’yad “unincorporated area “

        • Manfarang

          Ben Gurion International Airport.

          • dannybhoy

            How does that make it an unincorporated area?
            Ben Gurion airport is sited near to the town of Lod. A most unprepossessing place I must say, but unincorporated?
            Ani lo meveen.

          • Manfarang

            It doesn’t actually lie within the boundaries of any particular municipality.

          • dannybhoy

            Ah, that’s probably because originally it was a military airbase, the same as Ouvda in southern Israel..

          • Manfarang

            Indeed. What is now Israel’s Ben Gurion International Airport was originally named “Wilhelma Airport” when it was built in 1936 near the Templer community. It was renamed RAF Station Lydda in 1943. During World War II it served as a major airfield for military air transport and aircraft ferry operations between military bases in Europe, Africa, the Middle East (mainly Iraq and Persia) and South/Southeast Asia.

          • dannybhoy

            Why couldn’t you have quoted that in the first place?

          • Ray Sunshine

            It’s just the way local government is organised in Israel. The country is divided into five districts and within each district only the main urban areas are constituted as municipalities. Everywhere else is governed directly by the district council. It’s as if, in the UK, only the bigger towns in each county were constituted as boroughs while the villages and country areas were managed directly by the county council, without an intermediate layer of government. That’s really all it is. I don’t see what significance Manfarang is attaching to it.

            In any case, the five districts are pretty small. The Central District, where the airport is located, is about the same size as one of the smaller English counties such as Berkshire or Hertfordshire.

    • Sarky

      He was on a couple of days ago. Just got back from Bulgaria i think.

      • dannybhoy

        Hmmm.
        Last time I remember him posting he mentioned something about (minor) illness?
        Anyway good that you also picked up on it.
        We might not all see eye to eye, but we do value each other here.

    • Chefofsinners

      It weren’t the same without his encyclopaedic knowledge of kosher foodstuffs, but as Sarks says, I believe he has been suffering with bulgaria. Probably all that vorschmack durch technik repeating on him.

      • dannybhoy

        Very good Chef. Danny likes..

  • Martin

    Madam

    You are fortunate that your police station has a public desk, most I have come across are firmly closed to members of the public. It raises the question of how to return lost property to its rightful owner.

    Perhaps if the police were actually to address the problem of small boys riding on the pavement they’d find that those small boys wouldn’t graduate to greater crimes and their ‘stretched resources’ wouldn’t actually be stretched any more.

    Of course they wouldn’t then be able to drive around in the rainbow coloured cars emulating the likes of Starsky and Hutch or Z Cars.

  • You are fortunate to even have a police station! Ours has been closed down and demolished. We have to go to the next town or ring the centralised number.

    • Bernard from Bucks

      Our’s is now a Tesco Express, who serve the community much better (and faster) than the plod ever did. Ah well, ‘Every little helps’ – as the art-mistress said to the gardener !

  • Dreadnaught

    Rees-Mogg on as stand-in host radio LBC 10a.m. Monday.

    • dannybhoy

      Looking forward to it…

  • Inspector General

    Mrs May has recently attended a Christian award ceremony…

    Actually she didn’t. As if she would. The very idea! No votes there at all. Instead she went to a Pink News love-in where she apparently agreed to help deconstruct society and rebuild it in the image of Sodom.

    What is it about middle aged heterosexual women and that dismal life choice? She becomes the latest in a long line of women who should know better who have allowed themselves to be mesmerised by the one eyed gay snake. Unable to avert her sight as the thing twerks about and moving her head in rhythm to it, she cannot help but to acquiesce to their every demand and more. It just flows out while she’s in trance.

    Comments thereabout are telling: Mr Helen and Mr Jennifer are supportive. Others less so. Something to do with the Conservatives being the ‘nasty’ party. Who on earth called them that?

    http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2017/10/19/british-prime-minister-theresa-may-being-trans-is-not-an-illness/

    • dannybhoy

      I am so disMayed..
      A vicar’s daughter orter know better..

      • Inspector General

        One is reminded by Christ’s association with another diseased and unhappy crowd, lepers. He was friends with them and visited them but he didn’t exactly praise leprosy, now did he!

        • dannybhoy

          Well exactly..

        • Well, he most certainly didn’t say:
          “We’ve set out plans to reform the Leprosy Recognition Act, streamlining and de-medicalising the process for spreading it, because being a leper is not an illness and it shouldn’t be treated as such.”

          The woman’s off her Tory rocker.

    • Hi Inspector

      You know I was called a right wing social conservative extremists the other day by a fellow gay person when I said religions shouldn’t be forced to marry gays in religious contexts.

      • Inspector General

        You give his gender away, Hannah. Standard male homosexual narcissism. No consideration for anybody beyond their closely guarded and immensely self entitled community as they like to believe they belong to. Their own church, if you will….

  • not a machine

    Thank you Mrs Proudie for that view of the current outlook, not exactly cheery arrangements by the looks of things as read from my position but there we are. I thank Her Majesty the Queen for a great many things and often ponder some of the times she has been monarch in. Even though not of HM Queen age lady Trumpington has a good line in retiring I too am thinking what is to come and I have a heavy heart as it is my view some of her subjects have not thought well of running a straight ship and we now have the added delirium of dumbing down to craven materialists that carry little sense and think little of the real world. At the moment I have no idea where it could go or if people will see its socialist nightmare where you have lost freedoms and your mind will never be your own to place before God.I shall think further as best I can.

    • not a machine

      I was wondering if recent insect loss study had any link to the diesel particulates?. I suspect it’s pesticide combination but can’t rule out diesel particulates blocking sphericals.

  • How respectful of law and order and delightful these women in Argentina are:

    The women, dubbed “ultra-feminists” and “femi-nazis” by the Argentinean press, burned the door of the cathedral with a pile of burning trash and reportedly damaged a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary in front of the building. Many wore masks in the style of “Antifa” and were topless, with slogans written across their chests.

    The women also assaulted other buildings and monuments in the city, including schools, businesses, and a statue of a local historical figure, leaving spray-painted graffiti with slogans such as “Kill your father, your boyfriend, and your brother,” “Burn the pope,” “Abuser priests,” “Abort males,” “Death to males,” and “Kill your rapist.”

    https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/pro-abortion-feminists-deface-catholic-cathedral-with-burning-trash-paint-a

    • Hi

      Yet another reason why we can’t give the Falklands to these heathen types!

      • Demonic is is not too strong a word.

        • carl jacobs

          Too late.

        • Pubcrawler

          [Or daimonic, for us Hellenists.]

          • A bit of background history, Pubcrawler.

            Carl, rather humbly for an American, once described himself as: “A veritable saint of angelic demeanor.”

            Jack perceived two anagrams to be lurking within “angelic demeanor”:

            Daemonic General.
            Comedian General.

            It’s a self evident truth he’s no comedian, so …..

            Lacking rudimentary scholarship, ever since he’s been disputing the legitimacy of the word “daemonic”.

          • Chefofsinners

            Do remember me to Hellen and Daimon.

    • Ray Sunshine

      Another snippet from the news item you linked to:
      As in numerous previous attacks on Catholic cathedrals in Argentina, the police stood by and allowed the damage to occur, explaining that they wanted to “avoid incidents.”

      • Understandable in some respects. Would you want to engage with a group of foaming at the mouth, screaming, possessed, semi-naked women, (Jack uses the term loosely), out to kill or castrate all men? One would feel safer at the Battle of Rorke’s Drift.

        • Ray Sunshine

          Would Constable Knapweed and Inspector Cuffem take such a nonchalant approach if Barchester Cathedral were to be assailed by a horde of half-naked feminists with slogans daubed across what Life Site genteelly calls their “chests”? Perhaps Mrs Proudie might take it upon herself to make inquiries and pass on her findings.

    • David

      From what I saw of Argentina it is a country where emotions soon get out of control, and where the frequent demonstrations can turn ugly. Unlike neighbouring Chile I sensed that it is a country that is not at peace with itself.

    • Dominic Stockford

      Ah, pope-burning. I was waiting with anticipation for the first mention of Bonfire night.

  • Yet more from the tolerant, inclusive liberals:

    ‘Christians are Nazis’: Australian churches vandalized as same-sex ‘marriage’ vote nears

    Baptist, Anglican and Catholic churches have been attacked or vandalized. Even a Mormon building west of Sydney was graffitied with “Vote Yes.”

    Catholic leaders who spoke in favor of traditional marriage have become targets. One priest was spat on and called a “F—ing ‘No’ voter” in Brisbane.

    The violence is not limited to one city. Churches in Sydney, Melbourne and elsewhere have been victimized. Glen Waverley Anglican Church in Melbourne was defaced by homosexual activists with “Bash Bigots” and other phrases promoting violence against Christians.

    https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/crucify-no-voters-australian-churches-vandalized-as-same-sex-marriage-vote

    Truly, the world has gone crazy!

    • Politically__Incorrect

      I don’t know whether any aussies are reading this blog, but if they are they should sit up and take note. Dom’t make the same mistake made by the West. If you vote “yes” you are voting for a trojan horse. The “marriage” bit isn’t the real issue. You’ll be kissing goodbye to your entire culture and way of life. Not only will you lose freedom of speech, you’ll lose freedom of conscience too. It is the tip of a very nasty iceberg that won’t stop with homosexual privileges. Your kids will be told they can choose their own gender and will be encouraged to report any politically incorrect conversation at home. Say the wrong thing on facebook and the thought police will be knocking at your door. So, if you want the future of your nation directed by the kind of detritus who are vandalising and threatening your communities, then go ahead and kiss your own posterior goodbye. Better still, try not to be cowards like the politicians abd vote “No”.

      • Unfortunately, the hysteria surrounding the Australian Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse and Cardinal Pell’s arrest and pending trial, will have damaged the credibility of the Catholic Church in Australia and Christianity more generally. Rather convenient timing that.

        • Politically__Incorrect

          That’s true Jack, though if they vote yes they will be giving way to an even worse set of bullies. If they have had as much public debate on homosexuality in Australia as we had here then you can bet your last can of Fosters that the average Aussie will not have a balanced view on the matter, and may well conflate the sexual misdemeanours of some church members with the alleged “discrimination” of gays.

      • dannybhoy

        And this is what Christians have been concerned about all along. It’s the effect this will have on society when the natural is replaced by the unnatural. Mother and Father replaced by ‘Parent 1 and Parent 2; or 3 or 4. When childhood innocence is replaced by sexualised uncertainty, purity replaced by smirking corruption and the death of culture.

    • Anton

      These actions will tip a lot of people into voting No.

    • not a machine

      Spat on a priest? Mmm they are then merely the spital party where only dangerous substances can exit the mouth 🙂

    • Coniston

      The world has not become crazy, it has become demonic.

  • The Duke of Umberland, England

    Mrs Proudie,

    ‘As for Tereason May fighting our corner, forget it. The Appeaser appears to have caved in, which some of us knew would happen all along.’

    The Tories warn us, that if we vote agianst them then we’ll let the National Socialists in. The latter will raise corporation tax: firms and jobs will flee abroad.

    If the Tory fails on Brexit, then let there be no mistake and mark this well: we will vote UKIP or abstain; promoting the National Socialist by default.

    We refuse to play the ‘Tory-Blair game of triangulation’.

    We are prepared to pay the economic price in defence of moral principle: stuff the homoerotic Tory Party.

    • not a machine

      That makes it Blair was just the fluffer in the porno euro production oh well then I shall think how we are to take this game but not sure if eu poor negotiations are causing it?

      • The Duke of Umberland, England

        You don’t understand ‘triangulation’.

        • not a machine

          Perhaps

        • Chefofsinners

          He might not be coming at it from the right angle.

          • Pubcrawler

            Acute observation.

          • Anton

            Not obtuse?

      • not a machine

        £49bn before Christmas??? And a merry Christmas to eu stroll on mate stroll on

        • not a machine

          Seems a convenient number is it an every man woman child one what about eu fraud in euro? Why should we pay that? Not forgetting unsigned off accounts. Starmtroopers will end up shell hole in no man’s land. Corbyn can’t deny eu wants to hurt people?

    • Politically__Incorrect

      I wish I could share your confidence about UKIP, and I say that as a supporter. Since Nigel Farage stood down the party has been rudderless and vision-less, leading to its electoral collapse in the GE. I have a suspicion this new guy at the top, whose name I can’t remember, is going to steer very close to the mainstream political coast with just a few brief sorties into the more dangerous waters. They don’t seem to have realised that it is their faint-heartedness over issues like Islam that have cost them support. People who voted for Brexit did so because they want to protect this nation from being overrun by outside forces. Sadly UKIP doesnlt understand that Islam poses just a great a threat to our national identity as the EU. His response? More dialogue with Muslim leaders about integration.

      • Anton

        UKIP lost steam after the Brexit referendum for a simple and very happy reason: it was a one-issue party and it had won.

        What we need now is a new one issue party to tackle the issue you raise, and one led by credible men rather than football hooligans. We need a British Geert Wilders. But we also need to see that the clash with Islam will be lost unless we, the British people, repent and become a moral people again. for that is why God is raising Islam as impending judgement against us.

      • Dominic Stockford

        I am given to believe that a new party is being formed, consisting of many Christians who are leaving UKIP in horror at what the current ‘leader’ is saying on moral matters. I believe it is to be called Affinity.

    • dannybhoy

      “The Tories warn us, that if we vote agianst them then we’ll let the National Socialists in. The latter will raise corporation tax: firms and jobs will flee abroad.”
      Smacks of blackmail, and all that is wrong in politics which should be about building a fairer, more just and prosperous nation. Instead we suffer the tyranny of duplicitous egomaniacs..

  • Chefofsinners

    No surprise that crime is up since Linus was expelled from our midst. All those buggeries going unsolved… what? Burglaries? Well if people will leave their openings unguarded, they’re going to find him in their back passage aren’t they? Let us turn the other cheek.

    The leader of the Trans community (transatlantic, of course – what else?) has twittered his verdict: our rise in crime is linked to terrorism. Aaaaand… cue outraged incredulity from the Beebelzebub: “Terror crimes only formed a minute percentage… Trump is a bigger idiot than even we thought” blah, blah, condescending snigger. And yet the police themselves say that preventing terrorism is taking all their time and budgets. Beware the leaven of the Beebisees, I say unto you.

    Meanwhile… CrossTeach meets CrossParents. Headteacher Daniel Turvey has been more topsy-Turvey than dare-to-be-a-Daniel, but he has my sympathy. I am starting a new group to take assemblies focusing on Jesus’ death and resurrection. The GuardianEasters will be at your service, Mr Turvey.

    • dannybhoy

      He was expelled?

      • Chefofsinners

        I think he was, yes. Blocked if you prefer. A flaming firewall turns this way and that, guarding the entrance to this Eden, ‘gainst a bitter Frenchman who gurgles and writhes like a slug in salt.

        • dannybhoy

          French fried..

          • Chefofsinners

            Beware Danny Boy, he was last seen whistling his own version of a famous tune, ‘London Derriere’.

  • not a machine

    Looks like super typhoon Lan may give a lot of rain but storm surge weight of water may cause techtonic shifts

  • Dominic Stockford

    Mr Charles’s monarchy will be a lot shorter than our current and noble incumbent. This is something we might care to give thanks for before it happens.

  • IanCad

    You need another fishmonger Ma’am. Only the most basest of rascals would try to flog a limp chub to a lady of quality.

    “–he is objected against, not onely for being full of small forked bones, disperst through all his body, but that he eats watrish, and that the flesh of him is not firm, but short and tastelesse. The French esteem him so mean, as to call him Un villain;” So speaketh Izaak Walton.

    That aside, remedies must be sought against a police force finding no time for Remembrance Day marches but plenty to attend the Gay Pride shenanigans.
    Civil wars have been fought for less. Harvey Weinstein is a breath of fresh air.