church satanic fashion show
Church of England

Why is the Church of England hosting a Satanic Fashion Show?

This is the altar of the parish church of St Andrew Holborn. It is desecrated with all manner of demonic symbolism, being the backdrop for what was widely publicised as a Satanic Fashion Show:

satanic fashion show

The elegance, the grace, the boundary-pushing… Miranda Priestly would simply adore it…

satanic fashion show

This isn’t a prelude to Halloween: it is Turkish fashion designer Dilara Findikoglu’s Spring/Summer 2018 collection.

Darling.

Seriously, what on earth is St Andrew Holborn playing at? How is this consistent with its mission? Did the resident clergy approve this event? Did the Rt Rev’d Jonathan Baker, Bishop of Fulham, even know about it? How is it possible that a sacred space can be used for what can only be described as Lucifer lauding? How does hosting a Satanic Fashion Show glorify God?

“There has been a church on the site of St Andrew Holborn for 1000 years,”  say the church’s website under ‘Venue Hire‘. And then we read: “The large windows provide a majestic setting for any event.”

Does “any event” really stretch to Satan adulation?

The church’s T&Cs state:

4.9 The Client must seek the written consent of St Andrew Holborn to put up any display in the Room.

So the backdrop had to be approved by the church. Did they seriously consent to the altar being shrouded by pentagrams, goat heads, inverted crosses, all-seeing eyes and other occult paraphernalia? Curiously, the church does expressly prohibit certain activities:

4.6 not carry on any betting, gaming or auction activity on the Premises;

But not, it seems, demonic demonstrations. In fact, anything goes, so long as clients

14:17 comply at all times with St Andrew Holborn’s no smoking policy. Smoking is not permitted anywhere on the Premises.

So no smoking, but the glorification of Satan is cool.

O, for goodness’ sake, it’s just a fashion show, you say. It’s all completely harmless – no different, in fact, from a church hosting concerts, or a cathedral allowing Hellboy: Rise of the Blood Queen to be filmed in its sanctuary.

Ah, but it is, it is.

The Musicians’ Church will host musical programmes by Beethoven, Brahms, Beyoncé and Boyzone: it is not going to host something called ‘The Satanic Requiem’ or ‘Black Mass for Lucifer’, in celebration of the souls who are going to burn for all eternity, is it? And consider the reasoning of staff at Wells Cathedral:

wells cathedral hellboy filming statement

This is wholly consistent with the Cathedral’s mission, to be “an instrument of God’s mission where the Christian faith is explored, practised, preached, taught and interpreted”. This is no different from a church hosting a theatrical production of (for example) Dr Faustus: the protagonist may sell his soul to Mephistopheles and, unable to repent, end up in Hell, but that is consistent with the gospel of salvation and the saving grace of Christ, is it not? Dr Faustus does not make Satan alluring; Hellboy doesn’t bewitch viewers with the virtues of Lucifer worship and the benefits of a once-in-a-lifetime holiday in hell, does it?

O, hang on.

Bugger.

It wasn’t a Satanic Fashion Show, but a Masonic Fashion Show.

Phew.

That’s alright then